Rooms of darkness, I have become obsessed by darkness.
All you see is nothing, nothing, not a single ray or photon of light, zero illumination.
My room is quite large, about 20 feet by 20 feet. With two large windows to the left. Green foliage is all that can be seen, a line of chickoo trees. The trees and the green act as screen of green from the boiling gaseous body we call the sun. Yet he manages to infiltrate my room through the atmosphere then thought the tall airy leaves of the eucalyptus tree, then through the intricate tresses of the chickoo leaves and the mosquito net that screens my window, his messengers reach me like penetrating needles of invisible thread. He plagues me half the day, yet I battle him with the clouds my allies, blocking him yet they do so in vain as they disappear like the water they are.
After half a day of a campaign he retreats to his subterranean nest, only to be reflected back at me by is small brother the moon.
Alas the trees are to strong for the moonbeams and I win to rest in complete darkness. Darkness where my eyes see nothing and my optical nerves though active send no impulses to my brain.
No my friend, my battle is not over but yet to begin all over again.

I have 8 minutes to write this bog...
Firstly I don't like time limits but sometimes time governs you, not that I truly believe in time. Though I feel addicted to it recently. Yes an addiction, like drugs or alcohol. Most people in this world are addicted to time. Time is master.
But only the lack of which has made me aware of it's true effect on my life. By lack of time I do not mean less time but the complete lack thereof. My home, new home rather has no time piece, neither do I have a personal time piece... so I spend most of time (notice the use of time in this case, clear sign of my addiction) guessing, estimating looking at the sky asking my self is it morning yet, can it be 8 am already..
Only thing is that there is no sure way to prove it, really frustrating.
Time is an invention of man, not the other way round, but sometime I wonder whether it is the latter.

See I finished that in 6minutes.

Strange ideas find themselves in my mind sometimes, strange ideas, thoughts . I bet the same must be the case with other people in all walks of life. But I would like to think this phenomenon is unique to me. My fallacy .
I'm not a very “light” person. No I do not mean I'm heavy but the thing is I don't like light , any kind of light sunlight or otherwise. This feeling towards light has been a recent thing. A liking for darkness , or the lack of light has formed in the photo plate that is my mind and my eye have become more light sensitive and my night vision also has improved.
Shift in my environment is the cause … in the middle of the night I wake up .. All you see is a complete darkness. Its like your eyes are closed yet they are open or you are under a thick blanket of darkness. I seem to like this. Strangely.
Growing up I lived in city , a city filled with light and even the night was not dark.
True darkness , seems to give a strange sensation , since a person cannot see himself/herself , you feel invisible .
Invisibility in darkness.
Most people in the world are invisible , but that is a different kind of darkness.
Darkness of ignorance.
Darkness of Neglect.
Darkness of Abuse.

Hello ,
Last few days ,a new experience a change. A new beginning has been good actually and a different view on life has been more or less positive in retrospect.
Change in location and the change in the people , the change in the language , change in cultural values .. Is molding me differently ..
like a soft piece of clay I'm being molded by my environment.
Allot of new people and some old familiar faces guide me on the path that is my life.

I'am going to be an engineer.

Many people say Life is a game. I beg to differ on this viewpoint. I feel in context Life is not a game put a preplanned algorithm of random events. That seem to have a bitter irony to them and therefore it seem like a game. But a person can either end in a positive or end negative. But it all quite relative looking at the entire picture. Therefore it is the way you look at situations that matther in the end. I know it sounds cliche.Positive or Negative is defined by you not society.

Zdravo y'all
Started , reading " The Queen and I' by Sue Townsend.Yes the she the one who wrote the adrain mole diaries. Seems interesting enough,it's about What IF , the monarchy is dissolved in the UK...Not that I care but she is a really good writer and enjoyed the adrain mole series.
Enough of the what if's.

I have finished , "Self" and it turned out to be, quite a fragmented and a more or less confused account , no where close to the genius of Life of Pi,but there are certainly parts where we can see the evolution of his writing from "self" to "Life of Pi".I should reat the book in the middle , Helsinki episodes to understand his writing better. Actually fragmentation is great characteristic of my own life.
What fragmented lives we lead.
I remember , when we first bought a computer something like 10 years ago, it was one of the MS DOS machines . So I really overjoyed when my mother created a directory and named it after me,
Yes then all I would have to type was CD akshay and
my name came on to the computer screen, it was a sign that I existed.
It was like someone naming a street after me. If was as if I was alive.See it is easy to show a 8 year old happiness

By the way all my bags are packed , and I am leaving on a jet plane.
or should I say a Volvo bus.

Hello, world.
"Self" is a good name for an autobiography, not that I’m going to write one. Incidently I'am reading an autobiography,called Self,by Yann Martel. I really like his writing, this the second book I have read of his, after Life of Pi. As I write this my dial up connection is playing up. I hate dail-ups they keep on disconnecting every 20 or so minutes. Looks like it not even connecting and that high pitch sounds that it makes while connecting is troubling my left ear. Finnally the internet is up again. Reconnecting does sometime get on my nerve. Silence does not personify me therefore I'll just put on some music. I found that sometimes are so trivial but are so difficult a classical example of this is drawing a perfect circle freehand.
I'am moving away from here now. A journey , an adventure, a new chapter in the book of my life.
But uncertainty lurks yonder

My earliest memories on the earth take me back to a one bedroom apartment. My window jailed me behind an iron grill. The grill painted white, the paint peeling as I chewed .A metallic taste .Yum .The window faced an empty desolate abandoned warehouse. I smiled as I saw sparrows bathing in small puddles of water. Migratory birds flew overhead. Some pink others white flew in formation and swooped in as the landed on to a barren piece of concreted floor .Pruning their feathers I watched then intently. They were tall, taller then the likes of me, long slender legs with branched toes. Their faces stained in read and their eyes reflected the sun. They danced in the water .As they dance it began to rain. A gentle drizzle. Their danced instensified with the beat of falling water. They jumped, hopped and they danced, swaying their wings like hands.
Only later I would know their names. As dusk fell, and the rain subsided. I faced the east; the red glow covered the sky like a rash. The dancers of the skies left the wet red earth like angels in to the sunset. The Siberian Cranes, yes they were.
They were like flowers in the wind.

I’ am going take this opportunity to attack the developed countries and their cows.
Cows ...Yes Cows. The EU awards subsidiaries of 2.50 dollars to each cow in the countries part of the EU.
2 and a half dollars is a large subsidiary by any standard in a world where more than half of the worlds population are below the poverty line and live on income less then a dollar a day . The US and the EU tell the poorest countries in the world that they are in “recession” and they can't afford to reduce such subsidiaries .OK they are in recession all right, US and European farmers are going to make "less" money without the subsidiaries. But when these subsidiaries are in place millions of farmers in developing countries starve and live in substandard inhuman conditions.
Also , did you know that 41 million people are suffer from HIV/AIDS (according to dec 2002 figures UNAIDS) and every 30 seconds two children become orphans , adding to staggering number of children who have lost one or both of their parents to the epidemic.
Did you know that strict patent regime of countries like the US is allowing the the HIV virus to win the battle against mankind.
There are over 100 varieties of drugs in the market place which help fight the opportunistic infections caused by HIV. Some of these drugs are generic drugs which are made in countries like India, Brazil and Cuba.
These drugs are improved copies of the AIDS drugs made by the larger pharmaceutical companies, which are sold at prices much lower then drugs by the large pharmaceutical companies. But these drugs at present can't be sold in Africa and America.
An AIDS drug in Botswana (a country where more then half their adult population is HIV positive) costs 3$ dollars a tablet that is 10 times the average income of a person in Botswana. Where as a generic drugs cost 15 cents a tablet. But sadly under the present patent regime these drugs cannot be manufactured in such countries and have to imported from the home country.
Many a time people in countries in Africa cannot afford medication. This is a great crime against humanity.


Ok since this blog has no practical use I'am gonna list my stock portfolio,
I was holding AIRSPAN NTWKS (NasdaqNM:AIRN) BUT i sold in on the 3rd of September , I made 20% on the script I sold it at 2.31$s
Airspan Networks, Inc. supplies broadband fixed wireless access (FWA) equipment that allows communications service providers (local exchange carriers), Internet service providers (ISPs) and other telecommunications users, such as enterprises, to cost-effectively deliver high-speed data and voice services using radio frequencies rather than wires. The Company calls this transmission method wireless broadband. The market for its systems is a subset of the fixed wireless access systems market, which is the fixed point-to-multipoint market in radio frequencies below six GigaHertz. Its systems are based on a code division multiple access (CDMA) digital wireless technique, which provides wide area coverage, security and resistance to fading.
I got 1ST CONSTITUTIN (NasdaqNM:FCCY) today , at 27.50
1st Constitution Bancorp is a bank holding company that operates through its wholly owned subsidiary, 1st Constitution Bank (the Bank). The Bank engages in the business of commercial and retail banking. As a community bank, the Bank offers a wide range of services, including demand, savings and time deposits and commercial and consumer/installment loans, to individuals, small businesses and not-for-profit organizations principally in Middlesex, Mercer and Somerset Counties, New Jersey. The Bank conducts its operations through its main office located in Cranbury, New Jersey, and five branch offices in downtown Cranbury, Hamilton Square, Plainsboro, Princeton and Montgomery Township, New Jersey.

My current strategy is to buy stocks which were at the same price exactly a year back

I also hold Unilever Plc ,Royal & Sun Alliance Insurance Group Plc ,Invensys Plc , HSBC Holdings Plc on the london stock exchange

DISCLAIMER all the stock I hold are frictional .. and I am not liable on any my stock tips.

I was looking at the CIA factbook about the Balkan Country , Serbia and they say that Serbia is roughly the size of Kentucky.
See that is arrogant , how big is kentucky anyways ..?? Only 500 million of the world residents are american for the rest of us we do not know big Kentucky is (may be some of the 500 mill ppl in the us donot know how big kentucky is?)
So I read that Serbia and Montenegro is "roughly" the size of Kentucky. That statement leads me no where. Therefore I donot know how big Serbia is anyways?Or should I ask How Big is Kentucky?

Something Bad is going to me,
Looking back it will look better ,
I don't really know how?